I Think My Boyfriend Is Dating Me Because He Thinks I Am Convenient..?
I live in a city that’s extremely far from my boyfriend’s place. We have been warming each others hearts for five months now; all by e-mails, text messages and phone calls. I only knew him for three weeks before we started dating; we met on vacation time, he lives in this gorgeous caribbean city, and had been extremely kind and caring for my sister, who went on a long vacation there Way before I even considered joining her; by the time I arrived there, she had been staying there for two months, and he seemed to have a crush on her. I found him very charming, even though he’s not good looking at all. My sister never liked him, and never saw all the wonderful things I saw in him; but somehow he still treated her in a very kind way. He didn’t show any particular interest on me from the first moment, he always treated me with respect and kindness, and had this image of me as the “visiting little sister”. One night before I left the place, I confessed my crush to him, he seemed surprised and he kissed me. We have been dating ever since. By the time he came to visit me, I felt really awkward and confused because he didn’t seem to have this urge for my sister or my family to leave us alone. As a matter of fact he didn’t seem to want to be alone with me at all. Every single day I tried to look my best and he didn’t notice… I can see he likes my sister, but he tries to convince himself I am “the one”. I am way more responsible than her, level-headed and neat; plus I do like him and she doesn’t. But this whole situation is tearing me apart because it makes me feel unattractive and dull. I am 19, he is 27. I don’t know what to think, or how to feel…
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You already know how you feel and i would call it “unloved”.
C’mon, sweetheart… If this were a movie you would be screaming at the screen “Dump that asshat, he only wants your sister!”
And i think it may be true. Either way, you are unhappy and no matter the reason he does not make you feel special or wanted and when in love, we ALL deserve at least that much.
Consider looking elsewhere. If you think you are only convenient, you likely are and nothing would be wrong with saying so to his face. Maybe he can convince you otherwise, but if not you are far too young to be stuck in a going nowhere relationship.
Life is short. Don’t waste time when you could be spending it with someone who adores you, who cares as much for you as you do for him. Being “better” than your sister (and i know what you meant, really) doesn’t mean a thing. Love is not a lesson in logic but mysterious and confusing. Whether or not he has fallen for you, it says nothing of the young woman you are or will become. Someone somewhere will find you ALL they have ever wanted and you won’t have to wonder.
i just don’t think it’s him.
gentle thoughts…
I know it might be hard to walk away from him because this “might be real” but if you think he likes your sister, then I would say leave it alone. You’re not even 21 yet! you’re gonna meet LOTS of other guys who don’t like your sister AND are good looking
Forget about him! 1. He lives far away and long distance relationships don’t work! 2. You’re still young! 3. He’s cheating on your sister, with you and probably others from home!
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